Dear Diary is a monthly love letter to the mess and magic of relationships — with others, and with myself. I don’t have answers, just lots of questions, but I believe in connecting through words. That’s why I keep writing.
If you love meeting in person, join our Secret Book Club Brunch on February 18! It’s gonna be a casual, super cozy, and delicious meeting at Moko Market Punavuori, here in Helsinki. Scroll all the way down to find two more meetups happening in February!
Grab a warm cup of hot chocolate, and enjoy the three-minute read 🗝
It used to piss me off that I’m always changing something in the community. And whenever I made a change, I promised myself not to ever change it again. Then, a few months later, I would be doing something differently again and fighting internally. But not anymore! Today, I finally understood why I do that, and I discovered that twisting things now and then is actually amazing, and needed to keep Secret Club alive.
Would I be part of a community I don’t really like? No. And because I’m sitting on the community lead seat (Goddess knows it took me a while to admit it), the club has to satisfy me. I know! You have no idea how dreadful it sounds to my ears. Pleasing myself is something I say I should do, but when it comes to something that involves other people, it terrifies me.
I couldn’t even convince my colleagues at work to have lunch at my favourite restaurant because it felt unfair. It bothers me if people have to do something different because of me. I couldn’t ever be a vegan. I simply couldn’t ever bother people to choose a different place to eat because of me. Well, nowadays in Helsinki it’s not a problem, but pretend you’re in France, then you get me.
Secret Club only becomes fantastic when I love it without hesitation. And if I slightly dislike something, I must change it immediately. Because a community is a living thing.
To add a cherry on top of that liveness, our precious pearls always influence Secret Club with their presence: it can be a comment in the chat, or here on Substack, a link to a restaurant, an invitation, a suggestion, or bringing their energy to enlighten our meetups. Our vibes are there to play.
Secret Club is a collection of womanhood vibes — iridescent, layered, and softly shimmering like mother-of-pearl.
I usually say we are “the most vibrant community in Helsinki,” and now I know what I actually mean.
OH, BUT THERE’S SOMETHING I NEED TO CONFESS
Keep reading with a 7-day free trial
Subscribe to Secret Club to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.